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Original Message
"Nothing to do with FS02 - just to make you smile :-)"
Posted by PaulCroft on 02-09-02 at 10:44z

Hi y'all
Nothing to do with FS02 at all this but I thought some of the answers below were just too good not to share:
====================================================
CHILDREN'S ANSWERS TO SCIENCE EXAM QUESTIONS
Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow.
Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the noon, and nature hates a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.
Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.
Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.
Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death.
Q: What is artificial insemination?
A: When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.
Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (e.g., abdomen.)
A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A, E, I, 0 and U.
Q: What is the fibula?
A: A small lie.
Q: What does "varicose" mean?
A: Nearby.
Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section".
A: The Caesarean Section is a district in Rome.
Q: What does the word "benign" mean?
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
====================================================
Paul Croft
10 miles south east of LHR

Table of contents

RE: Nothing to do with FS02 - just to make you smile :-),RobertVA, 01:11z, 02-10-02
RE: Nothing to do with FS02 - just to make you smile :-),James, 16:02z, 02-10-02
RE: Nothing to do with FS02 - just to make you smile :-),RayProudfoot, 22:31z, 02-13-02

Messages in this discussion

"RE: Nothing to do with FS02 - just to make you smile :-)"
Posted by RobertVA on 02-10-02 at 01:11z

ROFLM*O
Nearly as funny as the Darwin Awards.

"RE: Nothing to do with FS02 - just to make you smile :-)"
Posted by James on 02-10-02 at 16:02z

ROFLMAO
James.

"RE: Nothing to do with FS02 - just to make you smile :-)"
Posted by RayProudfoot on 02-13-02 at 22:31z

Hi Paul,
Wonderful! Thanks for those - I had a really good laugh!
Regards,
Ray Proudfoot,
Cheshire, England